Recording a message for a grandchild you may never meet

Some of the most moving messages are made for someone who does not exist yet. A grandparent recording for a grandchild not yet born, or one they know they may not live to meet, is leaving a bridge across a gap that would otherwise be empty. Here is how to make it well.

Speak as if they already know you

Do not write to a stranger. Talk to your grandchild as if they are sitting with you, because one day, watching this, they will feel like they were. Use their family's names. Reference the world they will grow up in. Tell them where they come from.

What to include

• Who you are, in your own words, not a resume: what you loved, what made you laugh, what you believed.
• The family stories that would otherwise be lost, the ones only you still carry.
• What you would want for them, said gently.
• A blessing, if that is part of your tradition. Many families use this to pass on a blessing or an ethical will.

The honesty that makes it land

If you are recording because you may not be there, you do not have to pretend otherwise. A simple line, "I'm making this so that even if we never meet, you'll know me," is not sad to a grandchild watching years later. It is the reason the video exists, and they will feel loved by it.

How to leave it for them

Record it now and store it safely, then decide when it should reach them: on a birthday, when they come of age, or handed to them by their parents at the right moment. Our guide for grandchildren walks through timing and delivery.

A grandchild who grows up having seen your face and heard your voice has something no photograph could give them. Record it while you can.